Sometimes, when people aren’t happy with their fathers, they write something to show them that, like a song or a play. Or a movie (if they have a LOT of energy).
This is kind of the opposite of that.
My dad is the freaking BEST. Not only does he share my occasionally sarcastic, overkill-laden and kooky sense of humor, he also happens to set a good example as a human being each and every day. And there aren’t many people you can say that about.
Recently I told my boss that when I get into a tough situation at work, my go-to reaction is, “What would my dad do?” This method helps me out on a very regular basis when what I really want is to punch someone in the face. Or send them a mean email.
So, in celebration of Fathers’ Day, here are ten things I have learned from my dad:
- Never burn a bridge (literally OR figuratively). You will regret it at some point.
- Look at every situation as an opportunity for a learning experience. (This one can be tough but has really come in handy on more than a few occasions.)
- Cheetos are delicious. Fritos, too.
- Long last names give you character. (It’s true. Not that short last names give you less character, or anything.)
- Breakfast sandwiches are delicious. Especially with hash browns. And bacon. Mmmm…bacon.
- Family is more important than money AND business.
- Your character is all you have. When you compromise that, you have nothing left.
- Travel is incredibly important. Likewise, living abroad. (Even if it’s Russia.) My parents have given me some irreplaceable opportunities over the course of my life so far to go amazing places, and that’s something that I will continue to cherish.
- Good beer is VERY important to have in your fridge. Also, gin and tonics (shout out to Mom).
- Overkill is the best comedy. (This one may be kind of subjective. But I definitely agree.)
See, Dad? I was so listening.
Errrrrbody throw your hands in the air if you love yo dad!
I LOVE YOU, DAD! Happy fathers’ day!!
[Face it, Dad. You knew this picture was going to surface some day.]
TESS TAKES OVER THE WORLD! 
Wow, what a nice Father’s Day prezzie!
Alas, I have failed in some sense because you have omitted an essential life lesson that certainly belongs in the Top Ten: peanut M&Ms are one of the most sublime experiences one can have on this earth. Perhaps as an addendum to #3 on your list?
I love you honey!